Life is full of surprises

The two most prominent surprises in my life that stick out in my mind are:  finding out that the girl I had been carrying around in my belly for 9 months was in fact a boy and being told I had a cancerous tumor after my colononscopy.

I was told when I was 5 months pregnant that I was having a second girl and we prepared the rest of the pregnancy for our daughter.  When I gave birth and found out that I had a boy instead, it was shocking for less time than one would think.  I would say within hours I was already used to the idea and within days it was like a distant memory that we were supposed to have had another girl instead of a boy.  Except of course for the bright pink room that they both still share.

Finding out that I had cancer, well, there isn't a day that I don't have a moment in it where I say, really this is my life now?  Can't I wake up already and have this bad nightmare be over?  But having a boy made the second surprise of having cancer a tiny bit easier to handle.  I have decided that after having the poison of chemo I am certainly not going to create any more babies in my body.  If I end up getting radiation I won't even have that choice, I will become infertile and go through menopause at the age of 32.  When I thought I was having a 2nd girl I had promised Bryan I was willing to try one more time for a boy to carry on the Ploutz name.  And lo and behold I didn't even have to!  I am totally ok with the idea of not having anymore kids and I feel blessed that I don't have to go through an emotional roller coaster with this situation.  I think being emotionally exhausted every day for the past 5 months has made me realize that in my new life I couldn't handle another baby and my two healthy beautiful children are such a blessing, what more could I ask for?