Gratitutde

I have been thinking again about how grateful I am for so many things I have going on in my life right now.  This is the first summer since I don't know when, that I have been able to spend all my time with my kids and my mom!  She leaves on Monday (more on that later).  I have been feeling fairly good except for still being really tired.  I am still napping and I am not sure I will be able to do that after my mom leaves.

The diet is going really well.  It is pretty empowering.  I believe it is working, so that's all that matters I guess. I feel like I have control over something and that feels really good.  I am also exercising regularly (which I also don't know how to continue without my mom to babysit while I do so).  The exercise is very empowering as well. When I have to push through a hard run I just tell myself how good it is for my body to be pumping all this oxygen through it, cancer doesn't like oxygen, so take that, cancer!  I have been juicing every day and that always makes me feel good. It feels so good to take control over all these things and for that I am grateful.

Another thing I am grateful for is my sleep!  When I was on chemo I had a lot of difficulty sleeping.  I would wake up in the middle of the night for hours, not able to fall back asleep.  I can sleep all night now without that happening and still take naps.  It is a great thing to be able to sleep and for that I am grateful.

I am so grateful that I have such a loving and great husband.  He has been there for me through everything and been by my side whenever I needed him.  He has had to listen to the kids ask for me when I was sick in bed through chemo and be the one to tell them that mommy can't come read stories right now.  He has been a great father as always but has really handled everything with grace and I never have to worry about my kids hearts or heads when they are with him!  He has been a rock for me and without him I wouldn't be as strong as I am through all of this. 

And last but of course not least I am thankful for my mom.  She has basically turned her life upside down for me since September of last year. She has moved out here and gone home only for short periods of time to check on her business and her home.  She has been here through everything and for that I am eternally grateful.  She has slept in the hospital on tiny couches to keep me company and stay by my side.  She has held my hand, my head and my heart in hers and I know will always be there for me.  We both joke that hopefully she will only be back for vacations from now on but both know that probably won't be the case.   As I well know, the love for your children is something that nothing compares to.  Like I said earlier, I don't know how I will be able to nap without her here to babysit, how I will be able to run without her here to babysit and how I will be able to keep myself sane these last weeks of summer without my built in free nanny! 

Thank God for moms and of course thank you God for giving me the best one in the world, how could I be so lucky! :)