I have decided to surrender to chemo, or at least that's how it feels. I have been experiencing a lot of pain and discomfort from the cancer that the chemo will hopefully help with but of course it comes with its own pain and discomfort.
I want to try to start with just the pump but I haven't had that conversation with the dr yet. Tomorrow my daughter starts kindergarten so that's what I'm focusing on. I have a scan Wednesday to get a baseline of where all the tumors are before we start.
I guess my thought is that I can use chemo to stay alive until a good trial comes along or a miracle.
I have never asked the dr how long I have left. I feel like its bad to get those numbers in your head. I do know that the chemo prolongs your life an average of 2 years and that's how long It's been since I got diagnosed. Every day is a gift.
Love you, Leah.
ReplyDeleteone day at a time , my friend...while you do that we will keep you in our prayers...I promise...xxx
ReplyDeleteEvery day is a gift is a thought few of us possess. Thanks for the reminder, at least for me.
ReplyDeleteJohn
You're such an amazing, strong person. Love you!
ReplyDeleteThinking of you, Leah! I hope Elly has a great first day at kindergarten.
ReplyDeletePlease don't use the word surrender. I don't ask out of selfishness. I ask on your behalf. Win or lose, you haven't surrendered yet. Don't start now. You are a strong, beautiful woman who has faced this with more dignity than most are even remotely capable of. Do as much as you can, when you feel like you can, for as long as you can. You will always be our gift.
ReplyDeleteDanh
I certainly don't see it as a surrender.......you're far too strong to surrender even to chemo. Focus indeed on kindergarten
ReplyDeleteEvery day is truly a gift... for ALL of us. We rarely stop to think about that during our busy day to day happenings. And I'm glad you're not focusing on the "odds." People defy them all the time. Do what you feel is best for you. That is all anyone can ask.
ReplyDeleteMissy